Relationship Advice

Once again a little disclaimer before i get to the main body of this post. I am in no way an expert on relationships. This is just my thoughts on the topic. You are more then entitled to disagree with me but if you do you are probably either an idiot or in a failing relationship at this very moment.

Here is the main key to having a successful relationship. Get your own fucking life. If you have your own life, own experience, own thoughts, and your own personality you actually may have something to contribute to a relationship. Most of the relationships that i see fail are between two people who have no separation between their lives and those of their spouses / significant others. They start off wonderful and say stupid, ignorant shit like:

"i know we spend a lot of time together but i love him/her so much i don't want to be apart"

"he/she is my best friend and my partner/lover"

"we finish each others sentences"

"i can't remember the last time i went a whole day without seeing him/her"

Let me know how that works out for you. I bet i can guess though. Usually people who say shit like that are the couple that a couple months down the road can't stand the sight of their partner. Then suddenly they are saying things like:

"i need some time for myself"

"he/she is so needy"

"all we ever talk about is us!"

"doesn't he/she have any goddamn friends?"

You want your relationship to work? Then get your own fucking life! Have experiences, thoughts, feelings, and opinions that are based on something other then your partner. That way you have something to talk about other then your relationship. As much as in the beginning it may seem like nothing in your life is of any importance other then your relationship, you are sadly mistaken. Your relationship is a part of your life, not your entire life. The best way i can think of to describe it is think of your favorite food. Got it? Now eat it everyday, talk about it everyday, and carry it with you everywhere you go. Now see how much you fucking like that food after a month or two of doing this. I'm not down on relationships in any way, I'm in one. But i don't eat, sleep, and shit my relationship. I have a life, my OWN life. Don't get my wrong, I'm not selfish and my relationship is important to me. I just value it enough and have enough confidence in it to not wallow in it 24/7. The life i have separate from that of my partner enables me to have something to bring to the table. Want to have a successful relationship? Try having a life. I find it helps.